The holidays are decided in October, not the week of.

Thanksgiving is Thursday, November 26 this year, and both Dearborn Public Schools and Wyandotte Public Schools are out November 25 through 27, then off again from December 21 through January 1. For separated parents those dates are where the year's hardest conversations happen, usually in a text thread the week before, when it's too late for anyone else to help. Michigan law gives holidays priority over the regular schedule, but only when the order actually says who has which holiday. If yours doesn't, or says something like "as the parties agree," October is the month to fix it, because the court process takes weeks, not days.

Do holidays override the regular parenting time schedule in Michigan?

Yes, when the order spells them out. The Michigan Parenting Time Guideline, published by the State Court Administrative Office, says the holiday schedule should be followed even if the holiday falls on the other parent's normal time, and it recommends that orders list each holiday specifically. That's why many Michigan orders alternate Thanksgiving and split winter break, with one parent taking the first half in even years and the other in odd years.

The trouble starts when the order doesn't do that. Orders that say "reasonable parenting time" or "as the parties agree" work fine while parents are getting along, and they stop working the first year someone's family plans a trip. A vague order also makes enforcement much harder, because the Friend of the Court can decline to act on a complaint when the order has no enforceable term to enforce.

How do you get specific holiday terms in your order?

Ask for them. MCL 722.27a(8) says parenting time must be granted in specific terms if either parent asks, at any time. The statute lets the court set exact pickup and return times, who handles transportation and who pays for it, notice requirements when a visit won't happen, and limits on third parties during parenting time. For the holidays, that usually means naming the holiday, the start and end times, and the exchange location.

If you and the other parent can agree, it's simpler and faster. Under MCL 722.27a(2), when parents agree on parenting time terms, the court has to enter them unless it finds by clear and convincing evidence that they aren't in the child's best interests. In Wayne County, parents who've already agreed can both sign the motion, and the court mails a date to put the agreement on the record. Getting the holidays written down in October, while nobody's bags are packed, is a lot easier than negotiating them in late November.

How long does a parenting time motion take in Wayne County?

Long enough that October matters. Motions are filed with the 3rd Circuit Court at the Coleman A. Young Municipal Center in Detroit, online filing is recommended, and the filing fee for a motion to change parenting time is $100, with fee waivers available to those who qualify. After filing, you submit a request through the Friend of the Court to get a referee hearing date, and the court says that date depends on its availability. The motion may also be sent to mediation first.

There's no official promise of how fast a hearing comes, but the court's own FAQ says that even a request to enforce existing parenting time typically reaches a referee in about four weeks. After a referee makes a recommendation, either parent has 21 days to object and ask for a hearing in front of the judge. Add that up and a motion filed in mid November is unlikely to resolve Thanksgiving, while one filed in October has a real chance of settling both holidays.

Can you take the kids out of state for the holidays?

Usually, for a visit. Michigan custody orders restrict moving a child's domicile out of state without court approval, and moving a child's legal residence more than 100 miles under certain circumstances, but a holiday trip to see family isn't a change of domicile. International travel is different. Every Michigan parenting time order must bar exercising parenting time in a country that hasn't joined the Hague Convention on child abduction unless both parents give the court written consent, and a passport for a child under 16 needs both parents' signatures.

The practical problem is notice. Some families put a written notice requirement for out of state trips into their orders, and the Guideline's sample language uses 30 days. If you're planning to drive to Ohio for Thanksgiving or fly somewhere for winter break, say so in writing early. We covered the longer term version of this question in our piece on the 100 mile rule.

What if the other parent won't follow the holiday schedule?

File a complaint with the Friend of the Court and keep a record of what happened. Under Michigan law, the Friend of the Court has to respond to a written parenting time complaint, and its options include make up parenting time, a joint meeting, mediation, a motion to modify the order, or contempt. The complaint needs to be filed promptly, because the office can decline to act on a violation that happened more than 56 days earlier.

Make up time follows a specific rule. It has to be the same type as what was missed, a holiday for a holiday, it has to be used within a year, and the parent who was denied picks when it happens, with 28 days' written notice for holiday make up time. If a court finds a parent violated the order without good cause, MCL 552.644 allows fines, jail, suspension of a driver's license, and other sanctions. One thing that never works is withholding the holidays over unpaid child support, or holding back support over a missed visit. The Legislature's own Friend of the Court guide says parenting time and support are separate parts of an order, and one isn't a remedy for the other.

What should you do this month?

Read your order tonight and look for the words Thanksgiving and winter break. If they're there with dates and times, confirm the plan with the other parent in writing now, so the week before the holiday is a reminder rather than a negotiation. If they aren't, or the language is vague, talk to the other parent about an agreement you can both sign, and if that doesn't work, file before the end of October.

Holiday disputes feel urgent because they arrive late, but the law is built around specific terms, and those take time to put in place. Our family law team handles parenting time motions in Wayne, Oakland, Macomb, and Monroe counties, and our guides to summer parenting time disputes and the best interest factors cover the rest of the year. The holidays are decided in October, and the parents who use this month usually spend late November thinking about something else.

Quick answers

Who gets the kids on Thanksgiving in Michigan?

Whoever your parenting time order gives Thanksgiving to. Holidays in the order take priority over the regular schedule. Many Michigan orders alternate Thanksgiving by even and odd years, but there's no automatic default if your order doesn't say.

Can I change my holiday parenting time schedule in Michigan?

Yes. Either parent can ask the court to set parenting time in specific terms at any time under MCL 722.27a(8). If both parents agree, the court will usually enter the agreement. In Wayne County, a motion to change parenting time costs $100 to file.

What happens if my ex keeps the kids on my holiday?

File a written complaint with the Friend of the Court within 56 days. Michigan law provides make up time of the same type, a holiday for a holiday, used within a year, and contempt sanctions if the court finds the violation was without good cause.

Can I deny parenting time if child support isn't paid in Michigan?

No. Parenting time and child support are separate parts of a court order. Unpaid support is enforced through the Friend of the Court, not by withholding the children.

Related reading

• Summer Parenting Time and Vacation Disputes in Michigan
• Change of Domicile and the 100 Mile Rule
• Michigan Child Custody and the Best Interest Factors
• Family Law and Divorce at D.C. Law